One of the reasons I will effectively drop anything and everything to read a book by Larry Correia, aka the “International Lord of Hate”, is that he not only is nearly as prolific as John Ringo, but is, if possible, even funnier when he goes off on a rant. Given the high bar needed to exceed the utterly inspired Ravencon AAR, that is saying something.

So, in part due to slow blogging activity over at Monster Hunter Nation, an old facebook discussion was brought to the fore by one of his intrepid minions to explain the background of the expression “justify the moon ferrets”.

It starts:

Brad, I apologize in advance that I’m about to use bad words on your page, but I simply don’t have the time, nor the patience to deal with this fucking troglodyte imbecile in an amicable fashion.

Instead I’m going to mock him, berate him, insult him and his fundamental philosophy, maybe call him some more names, rejoice in my giant majority, maybe add a few more insults, then go to bed, in my giant house in the mountains with my hot athletic wife. I won’t bother to wait for Forest’s response, because it will consist of some poorly thought out sound bytes regurgitated from Mother Jones and a series of links, and I’d rather suck start a 12 gauge than listen to one more fucking doofus tonight.

And after discussing (at a first grade level given he’s an accountant) the “why” of the mythical gender pay gap, he really gets rolling:

You are basically a Speak and Spell, and instead of when pulling the string you get “THE COW GOES MOO” you get “LINK TO HUFFPO” or “WHY WON’T YOU ANSWER MY QUESTION”. Only the Speak and Spell has a use. Children need to learn which animal says moo versus which one barks. You on the other hand, are completely fucking useless, and when it comes to entertainment, my money is on Fisher Price.

There are far, far too many good lines to quote. Don’t read it while drinking, or unless you want worried onlookers concerned that you lost your sanity.